John Kearns

Snow Down the Shore

an excerpt from the novel Worlds

 

 

As James Logan guided the station wagon south on Atlantic Avenue, Janey leaned her head against the cool window, gazed up at the streetlights hung with giant candy canes of evergreen leaves and twigs bound with red ribbons, and thought again about having more children.  Christmas was just not the same without little ones around. 

 

It was funny to be down the shore in the wintertime, let alone during the Christmas season, but James really wanted to see what all the fuss was about with the new casinos. So, he booked rooms for Janey and him along with their friends Dolores and Joey at Resorts International, which had just opened in May.  Janey had no interest in gambling: she didn't understand throwing money out the window for nothing. At least when she overspent on shopping, she had bags of pretty things to bring home with her.  But, when she learned the hotel was right by the beach and had views of the ocean, she agreed to go.  She wondered what it would be like to see snow fall on the beach.   

 

Janey hoped it would snow sometime this weekend!  Jim O’Brien on ACTION News said it might, placing his frowning bad-guy clouds over South Jersey.  And, it did seem cold enough.  It would be romantic to be snug in the hotel room with snow falling through the cold sea air and covering the sand on the beach below them.

 

What about James?  What did he think about another baby?  

 

He was non-committal.  He was certainly not completely against it, though he had a couple of objections — about her age, the expense, the size of the house Janey insisted on living in, the amount of energy and work it would require to take care of another little one.  But why should he mind that?  Most of the work of caring for the kids fell on her, anyway.  And once it was a reality once there was his child growing inside of her he would come around as he did before, as they all do eventually.

 

He usually got romantic during the holidays.  But not for the same reasons as she.  His attentions had more to do with the celebrations with clients and coworkers at Logan Construction.  Surely, it would not be difficult to get him interested.  But who knows?  Instead of understanding him better over the years she found him harder and harder to fathom.  

 

The old dining room was bedecked with holly and garlands of evergreen and strings of lights all around the permanent nautical decorations.  On the walls were Christmas wreaths and tinsel and angels.  Any available shelf space was filled by red candles, figurines of angels, snowmen, choir boys, Santa, Mrs. Claus, and reindeer.  Janey noticed clumps of plastic mistletoe dangling from two lintels.

 

At the coat check, she was proud to reveal her emerald-green dress with the shoulder pads and belted waist that accentuated her figure.  She had dieted over the last few months in order to reduce.  Though she was not satisfied with her results, she could see some improvement.  Janey hoped that James had noticed, too.  She had asked him what he thought when she was getting dressed, turning herself this way and that in the satin dress.  She had put on her nicest bra and panties in case he did want to undress her later on.  But he doesn’t really do that or pay attention to her undressing anymore.  He just takes off his own clothes matter-of-factly, like any other night, not really looking at her until he is climbing into bed.  I suppose that is the way it is with marriage.  But it was not too late to change that.  A getaway like this was the perfect way to spice things up. 

 

A baby conceived in December would be born in August, a Leo, a regal offspring.  That would mean giving birth in the hot weather.  The hospital would be air conditioned, though.  But wasn’t Janey getting ahead of herself?  A baby was conceived once without a man, but that was 2,000 years ago, and it was a miracle.

 

The piano player by the bar was performing, "Let It Snow," one of Janey's favorites, especially the way Johnny Mathis sang it.  The swarthy young waiter pulled out the table so that she and Dolores could take their seats on the banquette.  As Janey nodded her thanks, his eyes met hers for an instant, and she saw the start of a smile.  

 

Janey was not as young as she once was but she was not yet 40.  She could still have a baby.  But what about taking care if it?  Would she be able to function without sleep but with constant care and worry?  Would she be able to chase after a toddler when she was in her 40s?  She thought so.  These days she seemed to have energy she didn't know what to do with.  Plus, James made enough money to hire someone to help her.  

 

From her seat, Janey could see how profuse with Christmas decorations the restaurant walls were.  Dock’s had held nothing back!  It was the same everywhere they went.  All around Ardmore, Havertown, Drexel Hill, Philadelphia, and now Atlantic City there were colorful flashing trees in the windows and nativity scenes, Santas, elves, reindeer, and sleighs on the lawns.  It was on TV, too: all the Christmas specials, Donny and Marie, John Denver, Bing Crosby, Rudolph, Frosty, and the Grinch.  And this year, Charlie Brown’s needy wisp of a tree, made her ache to dress a toddler in a cute Christmas outfit.

 

A frumpy, drab-dressed matron was wobbling back to her table from the upstairs Ladies’ Room when she was followed into the dining room by a striking red-headed sylph.  She was no more than 18 and not wearing a bra.  These young girls!  Nevertheless, Janey’s eyes watched her weave through the close-set tables.  A scarlet dress hung from her wide, ivory shoulders on spaghetti straps and was cinched with a sash around her tiny waist and flat stomach.  As she sashayed past a luxuriant Christmas wreath, her thick, wavy hair got stuck in its fir branches.  The girl teetered on her black high heels for just an instant.  Then, with a smile, she swatted her errant lock with the back of her hand, and strode on. 

 

James and Joey had their backs to the young redhead and did not see her.  Janey saw from their reactions that many of the other men did — some of them old enough to be her father.  Dirty old men!  With a twinkle in his eye, the piano player watched her saunter away.  He tried to hide his amusement when the wreath grabbed her by the hair.

 

Doubtless, the young thing felt the room’s masculine eyes upon her.  The attention must have felt new to her, or at least novel enough for her to court it.  She’ll learn to regret it, though.  Unwanted attention gets old fast.  Janey hated it when men made comments on the street or when the Center City construction workers (even LCC guys, despite old man Logan’s reprimands) shout rude remarks, making the narrow Philly streets reverberate with their base desires.  What was the matter with them?  Maybe they felt all the time the way she did tonight. 

 

The charming Italian-looking waiter came over and took the drink orders.  Janey loved the tailored suit and bow tie he wore.  James asked for a Manhattan, straight up with rocks on the side, and succeeded in getting his old buddy, Joey, to join him.  Dolores had a gin and tonic and Janey went for a Harvey Wallbanger. 

 

“I always wanted to try one,” said she.  “It has such a funny name!”

 

When the waiter brought the drinks, the piano player plinked the chords for, “I'll Be Home for Christmas."  Taking a long sip from his cocktail and then raising his glass, James said it reminded him of being in the service.  He took another drink.  He heard it in Germany at Christmastime.  No song made him more homesick, he said. 

 

Janey began to feel that James and her chance to get close to him tonight was slipping away from her.  Perhaps he would get too drunk and forget all about her.  But maybe the drinks would loosen him up and make him more fun and spontaneous.  It sometimes did. 

 

James ordered oysters and Joey made obvious, crude jokes.  But Janey didn't object tonight.  Maybe Joey would put ideas into her husband’s head.  

 

She had to get James back to the room early.  Maybe the best way was to get him to make it happen.  When James was slurping his oysters, the piano player started playing "Winter Wonderland" and Janey toed James’s shin under the table.  He smiled at her but continued the story he was telling. 

 

James had told her that sometimes, sitting in a train station or in a restaurant, he wonders why people are eating or rushing to work or shopping or watching ball games.  Why aren’t they all somewhere making love?  Janey was not familiar with desire as all-encompassing as that.  She could drop anything to go shopping. 

 

 “What are you going to get?” Janey asked her husband.  

 

“I know I am being predictable,” James apologized, swirling the ice in his drink, “but I think I'll get Dock's Seafood Fry.”

 

“C'mon!  Try something a little different,” Janey teased, “spice things up a little.  After all, variety is the spice of life.”

 

"It’s hard to pass up the variety.  This way I get shrimp, flounder, a crab cake, and fries," said James.  

 

The handsome waiter returned to take their order.  

 

 “I’ll have the crab cakes,” said Dolores.  

 

“Madam?”

 

“May I have the lobster tail, please?”  

 

“Hmmph!” James said.  “Variety is the spice of life, huh?”

 

“I knew what I wanted when I left the house,” Janey declared shutting the menu and pursing her lips.  

 

James laughed and shook his head.

The waiter turned toward Joey, pen and pad at the ready. "Sir?"

 

“I’ll have the New York sirloin, medium rare.”

 

"Real smart,” snapped Dolores.  “We travel all the way down the shore and eat at a famous seafood restaurant a couple of blocks away from the Atlantic Ocean, and what does the big oaf order?  A steak!"

 

Janey smiled and shook her head at the supposed offense.  But she thought, if the man wants to have a steak, let him have a steak.  The place is known for that, too.  Let and let live is what Janey liked to say.  

 

“The steaks are good here,” said James.  

 

“Yeah, but he should have some seafood!  I mean, we’re a stone’s throw from the beach.”

 

“All right.  All right.  I’ll have the Beef and Reef.  That way I can have filet mignon, lobster tail, and some peace and quiet.”

 

Joe really was a sweet guy, Janey thought.  

 

“And you, sir?”

 

James got his usual seafood fry.  

 

As they waited for their entrees, Janey told the story about the madness that took place when the Flyers won the Stanley Cup the first time.  She grabbed James's wrist asking him if he remembered how crazy it was.  For some reason, James and she were driving around Clifton Heights amid all the celebrating.  Every driver was honking his horn.  All over the streets and in front of the rows of houses, there were men and women, boys and girls wearing Flyers' jerseys and carrying Flyers' banners and homemade posters.  Strangers were coming up to the car slapping them five.  Leaning out over the table, Janey slapped James's hand to demonstrate. 

 

"Do you remember that, James?"

 

"Yes, I do.  That was a crazy afternoon."

 

Janey arched her back against the banquette and continued. "So, James keeps stopping the car and asking people where Barry Ashbee lives.  He starts doing this Canadian accent.  'We're friends of his from Saskatchewan.'  And people were believing him.  'Barry Ashbee.  The fellow with the eye patch, eh.'"

 

Janey was overcome with laughter and leaned forward onto the table, putting her hand on James's.

 

"I had read that he lived around there.  We never did find the house," James said, "but we had a lot of laughs that afternoon."

 

"Oh, it was hysterical."

 

Janey lifted her Harvey Wallbanger and clinked it against what was left of James's Manhattan.  James laughed at the silly memory, polished off his cocktail, and signaled for the waiter to bring him another.  

 

Joey chuckled and shook his head.  He knew all about James's antics.  Dolores smiled but did not have much to say.  She did not share in Janey's mood or certainly did not have the ambitions Janey had for the evening.  So far, she seemed to take every opportunity to start separate conversations for just Janey and her and to make cynical, snide remarks about her husband.

 

A waiter propped open a tray stand.  Their young Italian server placed their entrees on it and then distributed them among the two couples.  

 

Janey dug right into her lobster tail.  Each chunk tasted delicious especially when she first placed them dripping with butter on her tongue.  

 

She joked with Joey, “Wanna try some of my lobster tail?”

 

"Hey, maybe yours is better than mine!" Joey laughed.  

 

Janey did not know the details but it was clear Joey and Dolores were having problems.  She felt bad for both Dolores and Joey, but she was miffed that Dolores's hostility toward her husband was getting in the way of her plans.  

 

The cute waiter reappeared and Joey ordered chocolate cake for dessert.  Dolores and Janey decided to share a piece of cheesecake.  They were already so full someone would have to roll them out of there.  They all asked for coffee, except for James who wanted one more Manhattan.

 

When they got back to Resorts, Joey, tired of Dolores's act said to James, "Hey, it's great that this place is open 24 hours a day.  And they give us free beers while we gamble.  Whaddaya say, James?  Wanna head to the slot machines and have a couple?"

 

"Oh, James, didn’t we have enough of the casino last night and today?”  Janey interjected, “I was hoping for a quiet night tonight."

 

"Yeah, but we've never gambled on the east coast before,” said James.  

 

“And when can we ever drink in a place for 24 hours?" asked Joey.  

 

Later, James murmured in her ear, "Joey really wants to go.  I can't leave him by himself."

 

So, Janey calmed down.

 

While the men played the one-armed bandits and drank Budweiser, Janey sat with Dolores looking out at the boardwalk and sipping a chardonnay.  

 

Dolores did nothing but complain about Joey and their marriage.  Janey sympathized with her but it was beginning to wear on her nerves.  

 

Finally, Janey told her she had a headache and needed to lie down.  Dolores gave her an aspirin.  They told the boys that they were going upstairs.  Dolores was tired, too.

 

Janey lay awake waiting for James, with the aspirin on the nightstand.  She was wearing the pink negligee she had packed.  She had read a little of Trinity but it had been hard to her mind on it.  

 

When James came in, he talked about how Joey had needed to blow off stream.  Can you believe the way Dolores would not get off of his back?

 

It was sad, she agreed.  

 

Clearly, they had lost at the slot machines.  Otherwise, he would have led with news of his winnings.

 

That glass of chardonnay made Janey have to pee.  When she returned from the bathroom, James had already fallen asleep.  He was already snoring — an undeniable sign that he had drunk too much.  

 

And, sure enough, when she went to the window to close the curtain, she saw that it was snowing.  There were few waves in the ocean.  It appeared flat and black with white scribbles of foam here and there, looking like shapeless Santa Claus whiskers discarded after a long night’s party.  Snowflakes vanished as they touched the dark Atlantic and evaporated as they hit the sand.  Despite all the snow flying in the air, nothing was accumulating on the ground.  Nothing was sticking.

 

 

John Kearns is the salon producer for Irish American Writers and Artists Inc. He is the author of the short-story collection Dreams and Dull Realities and the novel, The World. His novel-in-progress, Worlds, was a finalist in the 2002 New Century Writers’ Awards and the 2018 William Wisdom – William Faulkner Creative Writing Competition. He has had five full-length and five one-act plays produced in Manhattan, including In the Wilderness and Sons of Molly Maguire. His fiction has appeared in The Medulla Review, Danse Macabre, and the Irish Echo. John’s poems have appeared in in the North American Review, the Grey Sparrow Journal, and Feile-Festa. John has a Master’s Degree in Irish Literature from the Catholic University of America.